FUFL Draft Results

If you hate reading, Click here for the FUFL draft results. You might have to use the magnifying glass to enlarge it. Just like your wiener.

If you want to have actual analysis of the FUFL draft, well then here you go. Not written by the YFTS staff, but by our unpaid intern. Who also remains uninformed that it's even posted here. It's not plagiarism if no one notices, right? Same goes for double homicide too I think. I hope.

Repete Smith's Pre-Season Rankings 1-5
by: The Pile On Guys

Before looking into these too hard, know that I took a trusted fantasy football source and used their projections and put them against our current starting lineups. So what I’m saying in these rankings (and when I refer to “our analysts”) is what the fantasy points predicting service tells me we all will score assuming the current starting lineups. Only 51.98 total points separates #2 from #9, so this will be a bitterly contested season according to the fantasy heads. I don’t necessarily agree with them, but that’s what we’re going with here. My commentary is in each team capsule. I hope you enjoy. And Repete Smith hates Two-a-Days.

1) The Pile On Guys - Talk about a pile on. Last year's champ with an embarrassment of riches at RB landed the fantasy gold mine in Tomlinson. Will it prove to be fool's gold since he took a chance on WRs early at the expense of another solid corps of RBs? Only time will tell, but according to our analysts this team figgers to be the top scorer in the league. LT can cure all RBBC ills, so RB2 and FLEX is not as much of an issue that it would suggest to be in this format and league depth.
Key Performer: Deuce McAllister
Prediction: 10-4, Loses in the FUFL Bowl

2) stop nagging me now - Nabbed tremendous value in the first 3 rounds, but the autodraft ended up reaching a bit too early on the QB, DEF, and PK. Doesn't matter as long as Steven Jackson shows Lucas that he does not have a vagina but is instead hung like a mandingo. This team will probably lose more than it should due to the likely erratic play (or not play) of Lynch (a rookie), Benson (unproven but talented) and Moss (injuries).
Key performers: Randy Moss and Cedric Benson
Prediction: 9-5, 1st Round Playoff Loss

3) Kool-Aid Maroney - Everybody drink the kool-aid. Every year this guy autodrafts his team, he goes to the title game (1-1). Prospects for passage to the title game are good with this squad, too. Solid team all around, but MJD, while a baller, will be hard pressed to repeat his stellar '06 campaign. The weak WR2 is mitigated by the Gates factor, and Golden Boy Brady should have all the weapons he needs to live up to that draft spot.
Key Performers: Maurice Jones-Drew and DeAngelo Williams
Prediction: 9-5, FUFL Champ

4) The Caged Bengal - Let the sabre rattling begin. Just don't let it lead to a sword fight between you and Steven Jackson, if you know what I mean. We all know you're hung like a Gergen pickle, but you did an excellent job with the draft this year. One of my favorites. Our analysts believe you score high marks in all the right places
Key Performer: Brandon Jacobs
Prediction: 8-6, 1st round Playoff Loss

5) Die Nasty - Another great draft, but will LJ report on time? And after his Week 1 success again HOU, how will he fare against the stout defenses to follow? Our analysts like what you got, but think you narrowly miss out on the playoffs. Too much risk at RB2 and flex to rank any higher, aside from projections. Key Performers: Edgerrin James and Vince Young
Prediction: 8-6, but end season on a 4 game win streak

6) Rugs on Valium - Our analysts project you at 6, and doesn't that sound about right for you? Every year you have one of the better drafts, but the FUFL has not been kind to our kind soul from the Breadbasket of America. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this team, yet it just doesn’t appear dynamic enough to boost you into a playoff spot, according to our analysts. My instincts tell me the Romo emerges to a top 5 QB, and Holt and Williams dominate. If Alexander returns to his best installment (v.2005 form), and Ronnie Brown lives up to the blue chip hype, well, then, we are looking at a darkhorse candidate for FUFL champ. However, we gotta go with the raw data, and that tells me you land right here.
Key Performer: Ronnie Brown, K2’s knee
Prediction: 7-7

7) Michael Vick’s Dogpound - I think you had the best draft in the league. You got great value at the following spots: TE in Witten, who will score about what the TEs draft several rounds ahead of him will; TJ Housh ~10 picks later than Chad Johnson for the same reason; and Palmer ~20 picks behind Manning for the same reason again; and two upside top 10 RBs to anchor your squad. I see nothing wrong with this squad, but the fantasy prognosticators suggest there just isn’t enough oomph from WR2 and FLEX to launch you into the playoffs, and maybe a bit too much risk of injury with Travis Henry. I disagree with our analysts, but we must trust the data!
Key Performer: Travis Henry and TJ Houshmazode, Housevanilli, or whatever his name is
Prediction: 6-8

8) Cin City- Interesting play on words, especially in light of the fact that you have no Bengals on your roster. You’ve done well at key spots (QB, RB1, WR combo); however, trusting your RB2 and FLEX to rookies in murky RBBC situations takes just the kinda balls that is usually rewarded in this league (think Dan Youhas). I like your moxy, but my rationality suggests you start off slow and finish strong behind the Big XII rooks. Let’s remember this is the guy that had LT last year, and not only missed the playoffs but had a LOSING record. Unbelievable.
Key Performers: Adrian Peterson and Brandon Jackson
Prediction: 5-9

9) Douche Bag Jones - Our great and fearless leader of the free world, Xian Jones, is either in it, or out of it when it comes to his history in the FUFL. It appears this year he is out of it, serving as the proverbial fantasy doormat. The FBG analysts suggest Portis is too great a risk to take at that point in R2, and I agree with them. However, Portis has had some big years in the past, and if he can return to his glory days, and Colston repeat his healthy game averages of last year (which our analysts say he does not), then I think he makes a push for the playoffs. Andre Johnson, while talented, is just not in a dynamic enough of an offense to propel you further. I like your team and am surprised by the results. Rock and Roll, Jones.
Key Performers: Clinton Portis (and he is the most important player in the FUFL, other than LT2)
Prediction: 5-9

10) Original Ganstaz - It’s an annual rite of the Summer season, I rank you last or second to last in the pre-season rankings. It’s also an annual rite of Fall that your team beats mine. Lucky for you, you get me twice this year. Who will be the other unknowing victim? Only time will tell. I think you have an okay team, but the problem was the R4 selection of Brees. That crippled your chances for success, and left you grasping for a solid WR corps. I think Hines Ward has a better season than my analysts suggest, but that won’t be enough for you to overcome the loss of a sound R4 pick. If this league were deeper, you could probably move Brees for a solid skill player, but I think we’re all pretty much set at that position. We’ll see, I s’pose.
Key Performer: Brees or McNabb
Prediction: 3-11